Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Hero Worship
"To a New Yorker like you...a hero is some kind of weird sandwich"
A great line from a great movie
But what is a Hero?
Webster's defines a hero as everything from the aforementioned sandwich to "the principal character in a play or movie or novel or poem" to "A man of distinguished valor or enterprise in danger, or fortitude in suffering; a prominent or central personage in any remarkable action or event; hence, a great or illustrious person."
Not one place is an athlete mentioned.
My first hero was my cousin Jeff. He was older which automatically made him cool. He had model airplanes hanging from the ceiling, KISS albums on the record player..(for those of you under 30...google that term) and seemed to always be wearing Cowboys gear. When you're 7...what more do you need? He lived with my other hero at the time my Uncle David. He always seemed to be driving a new and different car..one of the perks of working for a car dealer. (By the way my favorite? a huge blue Ford Galaxie 500 probably sucked on gas mileage but I am pretty sure we could have driven through a nuclear strike in that thing!)
Like most kids growing up, I considered athletes heroes. For me, the hero triumvirate was George Gervin, Nolan Ryan and Roger Staubach. Every time I stepped on a field or court I tried to be like them. I wanted to finger roll like Ice, throw a 100mph dart like the Express and scramble around for an eternity avoiding tacklers before finally heaving a Hail Mary TD like Roger the Dodger.
Did I consider them heroes? yes.
Were they in reality? no.
Bear in mind also that I grew up in a time where athletes cared more about team success than individual honors. Such is not the case these days. Most of today's athletes know that there is no "I" in team..but there is in "mine". Players who are unselfish are the exception when they used to be the rule.
Today, with the advent and explosion of social media, we have more access than ever before. Facebook and Twitter have allowed us to follow these people 24/7 and not always to good results. Hey, you want the good, you have to take the bad. For all the wishes we have put forth to have just a taste of their fame, it comes at a price. We think we can criticize their every move, then we get pissy when they snap back.
The dynamic of pro athletes changed in the 90's. As ESPN grew in the global entity it now is, athletes figured out that the more they stood out, the more they could get on SportsCenter. The more outlandish their behavior, the more airtime. Kids saw this and, as those before, began to mimic their "heroes". Oddly enough, one of the biggest stars of the 90's and one known for the occasional temper-tantrum made it a point to try and straighten things out.
1993. the Chuckster. Nike helped him get his message out..
"I am not a role model"
Love that ad.
Ever since the beginning of time, we have always put athletes up on a pedestal. I am sure Greek kids ran around claiming that they were the latest Olympian who dazzled fans with athletic prowess. This really picked up in the 20th century. Joe Louis to Babe Ruth, Bill Russell to Terry Bradshaw, Dale Earnhardt to Wayne Gretzky. We all did, especially as kids. Emulation, to a point is fine...hero worship should not bestowed upon someone just because he can hit a ball, drive a car or hit the open jumper.
I can hear you heading to your keyboards ready to bang out "not my favorite player!" and some of you may be right. Guys like Tim Duncan, Jeff Gordon and Matt Stafford and many others donate time and money to many worthy causes and love doing it. Some of today's pros genuinely care about others and want to help. Some don't. Some also like to do one thing and say another. Shaquille O'Neal has helped many kids in the Los Angeles area but his disdain for the city of San Antonio led him to organize an autograph signing in the suburb of Live Oak then, after charging people (including kids) decided not to show up. Drew Brees is another hypocrite. He talks about helping people and encouraging folks to give to his foundation, then accuses retired players who are suffering ill effects from the game of "just looking for handouts". Really Drew? I don't wish injury on players due to football karma but you're almost worth the risk.
So am I saying its wrong for little Johnny to want to be the next DeMarcus Ware? Of course not. However, parents have to step in. Let them know that while its OK to model some players actions on the field, some actions should not be emulated. In other words "Johnny..if you want to run and throw like Tim Tebow, that is fine..but if you taunt an injured opponent like Tim Tebow, i'll knock you on your ass." And no, that is not child abuse..it's discipline. Yes I said that and no, I don't have kids! Oh the horror! Hey I don't have to be a parent to know that your little darling is Satan incarnate and that you and your kids should be banned from Walmart. (that was for you Wendy) Did I get pissed at my mom for dropping the hammer on me? Hell yes! Did I think it was unfair? Absolutely. Was I right? No. A lot of parents are worried "oh if I am too strict my kids will hate me" At the time, it will feel like that to them for a bit, however, they will get over it and be better off for it. So will you. My mom at times had to be the bad guy. All parents will have to be from time to time..somehow though, your little princess' fragile psyche will remain intact.
You want athletes to be heroes? How about Welles Crother? The Boston College lacrosse player who on 9/11 helped people out of the South Tower...then went back in to help more people.
He only stopped when the building came down.
Or, on that same day, the four former athletes on United Flight 93 who tried to overtake the terrorists and in doing so, saved the Capitol and prevented even more carnage.
You want heroes for your kids? Sit them down Sunday and have them watch the 9/11 remembrance coverage. Tell them about the New York City firefighters who stayed their posts and kept going back into the World Trade Center. Ironically those who we would call heroes because of their actions, did said actions not out of heroism but sense of duty. They had families too. Their kids have heroes..sadly now they are merely angels on their shoulders.
You want heroes for your kids? How about teachers? You know teachers...those folks who you rely on to get your kids ready for the future when you don't want to bother? I remember when all a teacher had to be was a solid educator. Now they have to be educators, diplomats, babysitters and referees all rolled up. Yet they get paid like fast food workers. Teachers are supposed work in concert with parents in turning out a child who will be an enhancement to society, not a hindrance.
Finally...you want heroes for your kids?
Look in the mirror.
Parents have the opportunity to be the best of heroes. Who has more influence over your child than you? Especially in the early years, you are with your kid every day. Talk to them. Tell them why its wrong that his favorite football player gave the nice "self-employed model" money to have "special time" in a hotel room. Too many times, young ball players get into trouble in college or when they sign that first pro contract and they don't understand why. It's because too many Little League parents from Hell decided that junior was a meal ticket. They cared more about what the kid could do than the kid himself. If you have a child who is blessed to have athletic ability..encourage it, nurture it but temper it and do not exploit it. Make sure that they understand playing sports is a privilege and not a right. Make them still take the trash out, enforce the curfew you set, homework not done? Well, until its done they are going nowhere.
It's OK at 7 to idolize your favorite ballplayer...hell, its even OK at 17. Its OK to rock your favorite teams jersey. It's OK to get together with your friends and have some food, roll off stats and talk a little trash. It's OK to play fantasy football and debate your buddies on who was better. But in the end of the day, we need to watch how we throw around the word "hero". We need to remember that it's OK to be ecstatic in victory and downtrodden in defeat but in the grand scheme of things...
It's just a game, and those whom we would anoint heroes, are merely players.
Peace.
A great line from a great movie
But what is a Hero?
Webster's defines a hero as everything from the aforementioned sandwich to "the principal character in a play or movie or novel or poem" to "A man of distinguished valor or enterprise in danger, or fortitude in suffering; a prominent or central personage in any remarkable action or event; hence, a great or illustrious person."
Not one place is an athlete mentioned.
My first hero was my cousin Jeff. He was older which automatically made him cool. He had model airplanes hanging from the ceiling, KISS albums on the record player..(for those of you under 30...google that term) and seemed to always be wearing Cowboys gear. When you're 7...what more do you need? He lived with my other hero at the time my Uncle David. He always seemed to be driving a new and different car..one of the perks of working for a car dealer. (By the way my favorite? a huge blue Ford Galaxie 500 probably sucked on gas mileage but I am pretty sure we could have driven through a nuclear strike in that thing!)
Like most kids growing up, I considered athletes heroes. For me, the hero triumvirate was George Gervin, Nolan Ryan and Roger Staubach. Every time I stepped on a field or court I tried to be like them. I wanted to finger roll like Ice, throw a 100mph dart like the Express and scramble around for an eternity avoiding tacklers before finally heaving a Hail Mary TD like Roger the Dodger.
Did I consider them heroes? yes.
Were they in reality? no.
Bear in mind also that I grew up in a time where athletes cared more about team success than individual honors. Such is not the case these days. Most of today's athletes know that there is no "I" in team..but there is in "mine". Players who are unselfish are the exception when they used to be the rule.
Today, with the advent and explosion of social media, we have more access than ever before. Facebook and Twitter have allowed us to follow these people 24/7 and not always to good results. Hey, you want the good, you have to take the bad. For all the wishes we have put forth to have just a taste of their fame, it comes at a price. We think we can criticize their every move, then we get pissy when they snap back.
The dynamic of pro athletes changed in the 90's. As ESPN grew in the global entity it now is, athletes figured out that the more they stood out, the more they could get on SportsCenter. The more outlandish their behavior, the more airtime. Kids saw this and, as those before, began to mimic their "heroes". Oddly enough, one of the biggest stars of the 90's and one known for the occasional temper-tantrum made it a point to try and straighten things out.
1993. the Chuckster. Nike helped him get his message out..
"I am not a role model"
Love that ad.
Ever since the beginning of time, we have always put athletes up on a pedestal. I am sure Greek kids ran around claiming that they were the latest Olympian who dazzled fans with athletic prowess. This really picked up in the 20th century. Joe Louis to Babe Ruth, Bill Russell to Terry Bradshaw, Dale Earnhardt to Wayne Gretzky. We all did, especially as kids. Emulation, to a point is fine...hero worship should not bestowed upon someone just because he can hit a ball, drive a car or hit the open jumper.
I can hear you heading to your keyboards ready to bang out "not my favorite player!" and some of you may be right. Guys like Tim Duncan, Jeff Gordon and Matt Stafford and many others donate time and money to many worthy causes and love doing it. Some of today's pros genuinely care about others and want to help. Some don't. Some also like to do one thing and say another. Shaquille O'Neal has helped many kids in the Los Angeles area but his disdain for the city of San Antonio led him to organize an autograph signing in the suburb of Live Oak then, after charging people (including kids) decided not to show up. Drew Brees is another hypocrite. He talks about helping people and encouraging folks to give to his foundation, then accuses retired players who are suffering ill effects from the game of "just looking for handouts". Really Drew? I don't wish injury on players due to football karma but you're almost worth the risk.
So am I saying its wrong for little Johnny to want to be the next DeMarcus Ware? Of course not. However, parents have to step in. Let them know that while its OK to model some players actions on the field, some actions should not be emulated. In other words "Johnny..if you want to run and throw like Tim Tebow, that is fine..but if you taunt an injured opponent like Tim Tebow, i'll knock you on your ass." And no, that is not child abuse..it's discipline. Yes I said that and no, I don't have kids! Oh the horror! Hey I don't have to be a parent to know that your little darling is Satan incarnate and that you and your kids should be banned from Walmart. (that was for you Wendy) Did I get pissed at my mom for dropping the hammer on me? Hell yes! Did I think it was unfair? Absolutely. Was I right? No. A lot of parents are worried "oh if I am too strict my kids will hate me" At the time, it will feel like that to them for a bit, however, they will get over it and be better off for it. So will you. My mom at times had to be the bad guy. All parents will have to be from time to time..somehow though, your little princess' fragile psyche will remain intact.
You want athletes to be heroes? How about Welles Crother? The Boston College lacrosse player who on 9/11 helped people out of the South Tower...then went back in to help more people.
He only stopped when the building came down.
Or, on that same day, the four former athletes on United Flight 93 who tried to overtake the terrorists and in doing so, saved the Capitol and prevented even more carnage.
You want heroes for your kids? Sit them down Sunday and have them watch the 9/11 remembrance coverage. Tell them about the New York City firefighters who stayed their posts and kept going back into the World Trade Center. Ironically those who we would call heroes because of their actions, did said actions not out of heroism but sense of duty. They had families too. Their kids have heroes..sadly now they are merely angels on their shoulders.
You want heroes for your kids? How about teachers? You know teachers...those folks who you rely on to get your kids ready for the future when you don't want to bother? I remember when all a teacher had to be was a solid educator. Now they have to be educators, diplomats, babysitters and referees all rolled up. Yet they get paid like fast food workers. Teachers are supposed work in concert with parents in turning out a child who will be an enhancement to society, not a hindrance.
Finally...you want heroes for your kids?
Look in the mirror.
Parents have the opportunity to be the best of heroes. Who has more influence over your child than you? Especially in the early years, you are with your kid every day. Talk to them. Tell them why its wrong that his favorite football player gave the nice "self-employed model" money to have "special time" in a hotel room. Too many times, young ball players get into trouble in college or when they sign that first pro contract and they don't understand why. It's because too many Little League parents from Hell decided that junior was a meal ticket. They cared more about what the kid could do than the kid himself. If you have a child who is blessed to have athletic ability..encourage it, nurture it but temper it and do not exploit it. Make sure that they understand playing sports is a privilege and not a right. Make them still take the trash out, enforce the curfew you set, homework not done? Well, until its done they are going nowhere.
It's OK at 7 to idolize your favorite ballplayer...hell, its even OK at 17. Its OK to rock your favorite teams jersey. It's OK to get together with your friends and have some food, roll off stats and talk a little trash. It's OK to play fantasy football and debate your buddies on who was better. But in the end of the day, we need to watch how we throw around the word "hero". We need to remember that it's OK to be ecstatic in victory and downtrodden in defeat but in the grand scheme of things...
It's just a game, and those whom we would anoint heroes, are merely players.
Peace.
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